Ain’t worried ’bout no shit that don’t pay my bills.Raja Kumari, Mute
Did you start your day by hitting the snooze button one time for every year you’ve been alive? When it was time to get up, did you petulantly slide down the side of your bed like Alex Mack morphing into goo? Did coffee make you feel more awake but also more aware that this day is shit and can get in the sea? If this sounds like you, look no further.
The following is the fuel you need to spark your inner boss bitch. Because you own today. You own rush hour. You own parallel parking on a street 5 miles from your job. You own having to hustle to avoid being late. You own being late. You own your desk. You own the water cooler. You own Snide Theresa in human resources. And if you have a shit boss, you own them too.
Here are 10 jams by badass women to give you the boss mentality you need to own the day.
Shook, Raja Kumari
Vibe: Bitch resilient.
Highlights: Crushed flax seed in the green tea / Life infinity
Takeaway: Shook when you see a deity.
Vibe: I’m the bitch y’all love to hate.
Highlights: Tell that man you’sa boss bitch / Make some noise, raise your hand if you’sa boss bitch / I don’t think he understands you’sa boss bitch
Takeaway: You don’t have to love me. You don’t even have to like me. But you WILL respect me.
Tomboy, Princess Nokia
Vibe: My little titties be booking cities all around the world.
Highlights: Missy Elliot can’t stand the rain.
Takeaway: My little titties and my phat belly.
Chewing Gum, Nina Nesbitt
Vibe: I could be your worst mistake.
Highlights: I’m a made-up mess / in a backless dress
Takeaway: I’m just chewing gum until the flavors gone.
Werkin Girls, Angel Haze
Vibe: All about me, bitch, fuck what you doing.
Highlights: I have been the realest since my exit near the clit.
Takeaway: I’m an undefeated bastard.
There You Go, Pink
Vibe: There you go, looking pitiful.
Highlights: I got a new man, he’s waiting out back / now what, what ya think about that?
Takeaway: Sometimes it be’s like that.
Black Panther, Lady Leshurr
Vibe: I wish a gyal would.
Highlights: Dig you out the grave I put you in and rebury ya / That’s the only time you’ll be all over social media
Takeaway: Tell a gutter gyal leave the area.
Thunder Thighs, Miss Eaves
Vibe: I’m looking good.
Highlights: Mom jeans all day why you mad tho?
Takeaway: Thighs thick, thighs juicy.
Django Jane, Janelle Monae
Vibe: This is my palace.
Highlights: Celebrated, graduated, made it pass/fail / Sassy, classy, Kool-Aid with the kale
Takeaway: We fem the future.
Did It On’em, Nicki Minaj
Vibe: Move back bugs.
Highlights: All these bitches is my sons / and I’ma go and get some bibs for ’em.
Takeaway: More talent in my mother fuckin’ left thumb.
Flawless (ft. Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie), Beyonce
Vibe: Bow down, bitches. H Town bitches.
Highlights: Feminist: the person who believes in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes.
Takeaway: I woke up like this.